Caveat Emptor:
Hotels will never give you the best room on the first try.
It might seem like a pain to schlep around from one room to another until they give you a good one. But it's a necessary evil: the only way to get the room you rightly deserve (and, if you're a big enough pain in the ass, a free upgrade).
I've posted a 3 minute film chronicling our adventures at a FL hotel where the "king size beds" they advertise are really queens and a "water view" means you see a sliver of the pool.
Email me for the password to watch the video below.