Caveat emptor went with his daughter today to the BOSE at the Time Warner Center in Manhattan to try to get CE's daughters headphones repaired. We were told they were two generations old and they could no longer troubleshoot the problem but they did offer usa replacement headphone of the new generation model for a 50% price reduction. Then as a further enticement the salesperson informed us that the noise cancellation model could be available for $200 instead of $300. Here is where the problem began we took him up on the deal and went to the cash register and found out that actually it wasn't going to be $200 it was going to be $240BOSE won this battle because we proceeded with the transaction. caveat emptor buyer beware
Trump You
As an added feature for those of you who are following www.caveatemptorbuyerbeware.comcaveat emptor would like to tell you a story that might actually shape the coming election.
Typically CE tries to stay away from loshon ora however this story must finally be told, the truth about Donald Trump must be known and understood.
In the mid-1980s caveat emptor and Mrs. CE. Together with Mrs. CEs parents made frequent visits to Atlantic City. It was an exciting time on the New Jersey shore. The casinos were blooming, Mickey and Willy were greeters, and there was something new to experience on the boardwalk every day.
On this one particular summer evening, Mrs. CEs parents managed to get almost front row seats for a Peggy Fleming Ice skating exhibition at Donald Trump's hotel and casino. The opening act was a juggler - not just an ordinary juggler - he was a juggler on a unicycle, and as part of the act he invited a member of the audience to join him to assist him in his juggling extravaganza. As you have most likely guessed, CE was selected to be up on stage and work with the juggler. After a minute or two of throwing things at the juggler, proving that CE can follow directions, the juggler asked CE to light three torches and whispered for CE to step backwards and to get out of the way as soon as CE had thrown the last torch just in case something went wrong.
CE is and always was quite a cautious fellow so as soon as CE threw the torches up, which he did in great haste, CE moved backwards as fast as possible. However, unbeknownst to CE, just outside the perimeter where the juggler was performing was an artificial Ice skating rink and - yes, you guessed it again - as CE was moving backwards to escape from the flames, CE slipped and fell on his tuchus in the middle of the ice skating rink.
Although mortified and embarrassed, CE was able to get up unaided and walked to the rear of the theater. By this time, Peggy Fleming was being introduced and beginning to perform. Just then, CE looked to his left to find Donald Trump.
It was clear that caveat emptor was in pain and discomfort, But did Mr. Trump make a comment? Did Mr. Trump inquire as to CEs well being? Did Mr. Trump say anything at all to caveat emptor? The answer, of course, is no.
His reasons for not saying anything will never be known. We can only surmise that Mr. Trump was aware that as hotelier he owed a high duty of safety and security to his hotel guests but alas Mr. Trump said and did nothing. So my fellow Americans I say to you caveatemptorbuyerbeware.
No Tomato
Dinner did not go as planned - Mrs. Caveat Emptor requested a vegetarian quesadilla without tomato. Unfortunately, she received a vegetarian quesadilla with tomato.
When she raised the issue, the waitress denied having heard that Mrs. CE requested no tomatoes. However, the check (below) clearly indicates "no tomato."
Another episode highlighting the fact that consumers need to be careful: we need to be sure that a special request, even one as simple as no tomatoes, is acknowledged.
Caveat molestie
Caveat emptor was on the wrong side of the penny today and learned a lesson which should be learned by consumers and merchants alike and reminds us how we must be compassionate to those who cannot see. It started innocently with the good intentions of caveat emptor we had scheduled an interview for employment the prospect took the bus to meet us and had to return by bus. to defray the expenses of the bus trip caveat emptor placed a $20 bill in his backpack with only the best of intentions however as caveat emptor was dropping off the perspective staff member at the bus stop he reached into his back pocket and unknowingly handed the job candidate a one dollar bill instead of the $20 bill what an embarrassment. This error was only discovered several hours after the fact when caveat emptor was emptying his pockets to get ready for the night upon discovering the misstep Caveat emptor immediately called and left a sincere apology on the candidates a voicemail and followed up with a text message and then offered the candidate a job which was accepted. The moral of the tale is in the words of Jackson then Fret "don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy"
Check Your Speed at the Door
Stop and shop is over a hundred years old, which might explain why the automatic exit doors are so slow. They're setup to let the hot air out in the winter and to cool the street in the summer.
Caveat emptor: sometimes the tortoise beats the hare (at SnS).
Make America(ns?) Great Again
He claims he wants to Make American Great Again (TM). Well, I do too. That is why -- before a trip out west to see my daughter-in-law's leftist relatives in California -- I ordered a hat like the one The Donald has. But when it arrived, I discovered two problems: (1) It read "Make Americans Great Again" -- who ever said Americans are the problem?! (2) It was made it China -- that's not what I call winning.
When it comes to presidential politics, Caveat Emptor!
No Foam, No Room
I've overheard some pretty outrageous Starbucks orders. “Grande, triple shot, two-pump, extra hot, half caf', caramel macchiato.”
Gimme a break.
About half of that line makes sense to me. But for a typical Starbucks barista, it's one of 100 successive orders coming at you. Impressive, ey?
That is, until I make two simple requests: No Foam and No Room.
I say it every time. And without fail, they screw it up.
Asking for "No Room" should be more than adequate instruction. They should understand it, enough said.
Foam is tasteless - it's air, filling up the space with nothingness.
Caveat Emptor:
The glass is almost always half empty.
King Bedded rooms
Caveat Emptor:
Hotels will never give you the best room on the first try.
It might seem like a pain to schlep around from one room to another until they give you a good one. But it's a necessary evil: the only way to get the room you rightly deserve (and, if you're a big enough pain in the ass, a free upgrade).
I've posted a 3 minute film chronicling our adventures at a FL hotel where the "king size beds" they advertise are really queens and a "water view" means you see a sliver of the pool.
Email me for the password to watch the video below.
It Runs in the Family: Guest Posts
Shedding nachas.
Caveat Emptor: the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
My son writing about a recent experience at a NY cafe
No build your own omelette? I suppose the limit of 'three eggs any style' is open to interpretation. In any event, this place is entirely inflexible. Home fries but no french fries? Salad but no tomato. Seriously, why strive to provide good customer service when you can offer prime outdoor seating in the middle of union square.
Great point. No reason.
My daughter-in-law guest posting about a recent experience at a nail salon in NJ:
This nail salon has terrible customer service. After nearly completing my manicure, the manicurist and manager tried to charge me an additional $5 (for a $12 manicure) to apply a final coat of polish. Nobody bothered to tell me at the beginning of the manicure, or when I was paying, that I would be charged extra to apply the final coat of a second color. I get manicures all the time and this has never happened to me before. Moreover, rather than apologize for the confusion, the manager stood on principle and refused to apply the final coat of polish unless I paid the extra money. To make matters worse, she said she would rather entirely redo my manicure than apply the final coat of polished I selected at the outset of the appointment.
Food Should be Hot
Caveat Emptor:
Never order french fries without specifying that you would like them "extra crispy." Even so, they will probably come out too soggy and not hot enough.
9 times out of 10 you are best off demanding a fresh order of fries immediately after they arrive at the table.
Which brings me to my next topic: fancy dinners. I dread them.
Fancy people who order complicated menu items at fancy dinners are even more horrifying!
Can a guy get a decent hamburger?
Caveat Emptor:
When ordering a hamburger at the same time as others ordering more complex meals one should always ask the server whether they're capable of timing the preparation of diverse foods so as to serve them fresh and hot to everyone at the table, at the same time.
Idle Hands
Caveat emptor: two heads are not always better than one
Especially when they are making 1.5x pay on a weekend, on the taxpayers' dime.
Tax Dollars at Work
Caveat emptor: your tax dollars are at work
With all this dough, you'd think they could manage to plow the roads.
There's Only One Caveat
No soup for you.